Words of RG: Binge Posting (now with 70% more reaction images)

Wow that last post sucked pretty hard. Shit happens sometimes. You get sad, write and say some things that you probably don't want or even need to say, then everyone thinks a little less of you after. This post is not the last post. This post reverts back to biased opinions, obscure memes and more TYPING IN CAPS JUST FOR THE SHIT OF IT. This is how I run this blog, I write one really long post then I get a blog-hangover and don't come back for like a month or so. Then all the shit I want to write about becomes outdated. I call it binge posting. Don't give a shit if I'm using the term incorrectly.

Let's talk about guitars. Rather, let's talk about Guitar Heroes. Both in the literal and figurative sense.

Literally, Guitar Hero and Rock Band are both games that I enjoy playing, maybe more than the average person. Remember that tier list that I made? Pepperidge Farm remembers.

Figuratively, I would consider Jack White and Jimmy Page to be guitar heroes. Recently (recently being about a month ago, I'm a little slow, I have a job and other responsibilities, plus I'm really lazy and hard to motivate.) these two fucking manly men (The Edge was there too, but any grown man that goes by a nickname is....ummm....), were asked for the opinions on the Guitar Hero/Rock Band games. (more words and parentheses that are longer than the actual sentence)

This is the article from Ultimate-Guitar.com. This is where I get most of my music news and tabs (thumbs up)

tl;dr, Jimmy Page was pretty much like "Yeah, anyone who plays these games will never be skilled like say, John Bonham, they are faggots and they should feel bad" and then Jack White was like 'Yeah, they're pretty gay"

After I read this article I considered taking all my plastic instruments and setting fire to them in my backyard as reconciliation. Then I re-read the article and thought about it for a little bit. I read the quotes from Page and White and kind of laughed a little bit. Jack White says that people shouldn't be getting into music through games, but he has no problem letting Blue Orchard in to Guitar Hero 5. "I don't really like the games, but I could stand to make some more money and not make another White Stripes album by allowing one of my old songs in a game" And then I read this and rode the ROFL truck into WTF town.

Jimmy Page: "You think of the drum part that John Bonham did on Led Zeppelin's first track on the first album, 'Good Times Bad Times'. How many drummers in the world can play that part, let alone on Christmas morning?”

He kind of sounds like some sort of old man rambling about "WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE HERP A DERP. What the fuck does John Bonham playing the drums on Christmas have to do with anything? And since there is going to be a White Stripes song in Guitar Hero 5, does this mean that Good Times Bad Times confirmed for the game as well? FUCK YEAH.

IN THE DAYS OF MY YOUTH
I WAS TOLD WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A MAN
NOW THAT I'VE REACHED THAT AGE
I'VE TRIED TO DO ALL THOSE THINGS
THE BEST I CAN

The best part about looking up the tabs for the song is when I got the Godsmack cover before I got the original Zeppelin song. I had never raged so hard at anything music related in my life, even more than any other bad cover of any other good song ever. Fucking Godsmack.

You know what would be fucking epic. If they put some sort of version of Moby Dick into playable form in GH/RB. Then we could watch youtube videos of fat shitfucks and emo kids try to beat it. I would watch it.

So that now that Jack White is a hypocrite, and Zeppelin in a music video game is out of the question, who do we turn to to revitalize the music video game genre. THE MOTHERFUCKING BEATLES. FUCK YEAR. After the trailer when McCartney and Ringo came out at the Microsoft E3 conference my face was pretty much like

The Beatles: Rock Band comes out on September 9th and shit is going to be so cash. Harmonix's track record with music games is actually really good (they're not responsible for Guitar Hero III, World Tour, Aerosmith/Metallica/Van Halen, Greatest Hits) and I'm pretty sure you can't fuck up The Beatles anyways. To me it doesn't matter what songs are in it as long as these songs are included

While My Guitar Gently Weeps
Helter Skelter
Rocky Raccoon
Glass Onion
Maxwell's Silver Hammer (confirmed as DLC)

Even if they're DLC, if you put those first two songs in there it justfies paying $50 for a game with 45 songs when all the other future games come with 80+ songs. The Gretsch Duo Jet guitar looks sick, but too bad every Rock Band controller strum bar sucks. I'll stick to my GHIII Les Paul. It's gotten me through every song ever.

The only thing that makes this more exciting and makes my chances of suceeding in school or life in general that matter is that Guitar Hero 5 comes out the week before The Beatles: RB. At first the initial setlist made me skeptical at first. But now it seems to be a mix of epic win and hardcore trolling. I've listed the good based on my SUPER REFINED TASTES in a playlist so you can listen (I also threw some Beatles and Zeppelin in there for you, I went all out on this post)

As for the bad: Coldplay, Kings of Leon aren't fucking mindblowing and epic, I've seen too many Naruto AMVs on youtube to appreciate/respect/acknowledge Children of Bodom, plus they slaughtered Maiden's Hallowed Be Thy Name. I fucking hate Sublime and Sonic Youth and I'll admit I haven't heard some of the bands that are featured on the setlist so far. I'm sure I'll come back eventually and be like 'HOLY FUCK (random band) IS THE BEST BAND EVER!"

I'm out, see you in a month

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